Kingdom Come: Unhinged Tales of Mayhem and Mirth
Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2: A Hilarious Medley of Absurd Side Quests
Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 isn't just a brutally realistic medieval RPG; it's a comedic masterpiece of unpredictable events. The following side quests illustrate the game's uniquely absurd charm, without spoiling the main storyline.
Table of Contents
- Laboring for Troubadours, Only to Receive a Terrible Song
- Rescuing an Alcoholic Hunter... and Delivering Him Straight to the Tavern
- Confronting the Polovtsians, Only to Philosophize with a Dog
- Going Rogue as a Thief and Paying the Price
- Selling a Stolen Horse and Meeting Gypsies
- Why Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 Stands Out
Laboring for Troubadours, Only to Receive a Terrible Song
In Želejov, two indolent troubadours dream of Bohemian musical stardom, lacking funds, instruments, and direction. Henry, ever the helpful protagonist, embarks on a series of increasingly ridiculous tasks to aid them. This involves lute theft (risking arrest), procuring sheep gut strings, and even hauling sacks for the debt-averse duo. Their final "epic" song? A dull ballad glorifying Henry's mundane errands – a truly unforgettable reward!
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Rescuing an Alcoholic Hunter... and Delivering Him Straight to the Tavern
The troubadours' strings require crafting by the inebriated hunter, Vojtěch, who's found injured after a wolf encounter. While the intended outcome involves rescuing him, tending his horse, and helping him sober up, an alternative path exists. I chose to deliver the inebriated hunter directly to the tavern. His reaction? Unprintable. Our subsequent meeting was equally memorable, with a less-than-enthusiastic view of his shack offered as compensation.
Image: ensigame.com
Confronting the Polovtsians, Only to Philosophize with a Dog
The Polovtsians, responsible for Henry's family's tragedy, are encountered in a tavern. Instead of a violent confrontation, a bizarre turn of events unfolds. I found myself matchmaking, drinking, and singing with them. The climax? A philosophical discussion with a talking dog, culminating in a reckless (and hilarious) lake-swimming dare.
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Going Rogue as a Thief and Paying the Price
A successful burglary spree ended abruptly with a botched heist. My escape was witnessed, leading to a tense confrontation with the guards. While I talked my way out, my flashy accessories and lingering stench betrayed me – a testament to the game's detailed realism.
Image: ensigame.com
Selling a Stolen Horse and Meeting Gypsies
Stealing a horse and attempting to sell it to the gypsy horse trader, Mikolaj, resulted in an unexpected delay. Mikolaj's leisurely morning routine – porridge, spoon-licking, and belly-scratching – stretched the sale into an agonizingly funny experience.
Image: ensigame.com
Why Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 Stands Out
These are just glimpses into the game's unique charm. Every action, however insignificant, creates unexpected consequences. The immersive realism and attention to detail make each playthrough a unique and hilarious adventure, a must-play for open-world RPG enthusiasts.
Image: ensigame.com
Bohemia awaits!
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